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The Prosecution: One Friend's Perspective

Sometimes she films me while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it’s like a jumpscare.

My best friend of a decade, she, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when strangers see her posing or filming – I experience secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates video blogs about city life, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. Her content is good, credit where it's due, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her feed later, and it comes like a jumpscare: I might be no makeup on, making a strange expression or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone else, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to several industry functions, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has helped me with my career in design, but I resist our friendship to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or inauthentic, but at times it seems that if recording starts, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me laughing with another. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being filmed, edited, or shared for an viewers. I’m not a accessory for her online persona.

The Other Side: The Content Creator's View

I want Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about creating videos. It's more than a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online enables me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a professional creator yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your interests. I look up to people on TikTok who execute that style of informal, self-made film-making.

Creating content is my version of living actively: noticing the nuances, posting them with an audience that appreciates the art behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to industry events was my method of sharing opportunities, giving her a opportunity to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That isn't leverage, it's simply being pragmatic.

I would take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see what the work we make together can get us: an opening. I know not everyone likes being on camera, but often unplanned moments is what makes content genuine. Appearing on video from time to time is an inherent aspect of being my companion. I would delete anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my private videographer, but friends help each other in minor capacities. I thought filming a clip here or there would be enjoyable for her. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having Beth around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I cherish Beth’s friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to come between us. I’m willing to find middle ground: like asking before filming, and steering clear of angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about control, it’s about sharing my world while still respecting hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it’s just part of how I experience life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more excruciating than having a companion film you. I get that it's her passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to collaborate with. Given the uncertain future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She needs to respect Beth’s privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it isn't for everyone. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It seems like you care about each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Create some authentic experiences, where true emotions are preserved, not online archives. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she’s working. Each appears confused as to where the line is. The solution lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an acceptable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: is Marielle over-exposing their bond?